In a multiple choice question, always make sure 'all of the above' is above 'none of the above' or you will get the answer wrong.

Example 1:

This blog is
a) written by a dog
b) a waste of time
c) of no use to anyone
d) none of the above
e) all of the above

Example 2:

Jim Cooley is
a) learning to fly
b) sick with the flu
c) a GFBF
d) all of the above
e) none of the above

SEE?!

In case you were wondering about my weekend plans.

Friday:
Road trip to rock out with Flogging Molly at Orlando House of Blues. After the show, haul ass to pick up Jimsy-Poo at Orlando International Airport.
I hope I can function well enough to drive the car. After all, it is a manual and I have short legs.

Saturday:
Free continental breakfast at the hotel. Then to Tampa to see the coolest museum exhibition on the planet. In the evening, more Flogging Molly at Masquerade in Ybor City!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday:
Recover.

Jim, does this post meet the minimum hyperlink requirement?

My Daily Affirmations.
Okay, 'daily' is an overstatement.
They are more like semi-annual affirmations.

You have:
Fantastic Friends
A plethora of opportunity
A wealth of knowledge
Original ideas
Family that loves you
People who need you

What are your affirmations?
I know Kyle's won't include the word 'plethora.'
He HATES that word!!!

This is me. You thought I was gonna be ugly, didn't you? 

Things that are funny (to me):

Sneezing on people
Passing gas on a road trip
Monkeys
The 'Missionary Position'
Walking through wet cement
Cats stuck in trees
'Super Troopers'
Dog poo on a shoe
Eating utensils

This

As a human, what do you find funny?

I can't handle the pressure
Of trying to stay fit.
My favorite things to do
Are eat and sleep and sit.

I get to go for walks
Periodically throughout the day.
My favorite walk to take
Is the one before I hit the hay.

I've been on a strict diet
Over the last year or so.
Diet dog food, diet treats
So my bulging belly don't grow.

The condo in which we live
Has a weight limit that makes me itch.
So I lost some pounds, impressing all
Especially this Pomeranian bitch :)

She struts by me all the time
Flaunting her perfect figure.
I tell everyone she's not my type
But (secretly) I dig her.

One of these days I'll ask her out
To the dog park for a bone.
But my Mom will surely keep a close eye
So we'll never be alone.

This poem is finally ending.
My typing tolerance is getting low.
But if you like what you are reading
Please post a comment below.

February 2 was my birthday. I guess more like the anniversary of the day I was adopted and brought home (five years ago!). Over the past weekend my family went boating. I got to go too and it was grrrrreat. The wind, the water, the pound of cheese Milo and I ate on the sly...heh heh. He got the poops but I have an iron stomach. The rest of my family got really wasted and I had to listen to them talk about a bunch of crap I don't care about. You know, politics (I hate ticks) and religion ('All Dogs Go to Heaven' anyway). Other than that, watching them stumble around and pass out with drink in hand made it pretty easy to score a couple cocktails which made it easy to fall asleep despite the boat air conditioning making scary noises that sounded like obcenities.